Thursday, April 10, 2008

Chain Poem

We walk a seven day mile

that meanders without our consent.

We go where time goes when it's gone,

boulders on our shoulders,

breeze in our shoes.

We choose the touchstones that we carry

but not how far.

Listen to the Crow --

look to the future.

All ways are circles.

All goings are returns.

We walk a seven day mile.

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This came together beautifully... thank you all for participating and for your thoughtfulness... Human Being, the only reason I made any rules was so that you could break them... I live by the same rule as you that at least one has to be broken... Debra, beautiful line... the travelers meander as does the time... what do you think... I added a line after Honor's line to qualify it and help the flow into the next line... I love that there's slant rhyme on "shoes" and "choose"... pure gold... Andrea... thank you for being so accommodating regards moving your line... this was a great example of teamwork... and BBC even though he didn't want to play brought a real nice spark into the mix... I'll ask him if he minds us using his line but I'm sure he won't because he doesn't believe in ownership of thoughts and words... thanks buddy... if you all like we could try another one of these again soon... let me know what you think... again... thank you all...

17 comments:

human being said...

OMG!
This is superb!
One of my old dreams is fulfilled... team work ... especially in literay works... Here people, even the intellectuals, tend to be self-centered... brilliant solos ...no team work... since my teens on I've tried hard to do something with a group... the response, negetive... during university years... negative... at work...negative... here in blogland... negative... until now...
Hopper, you are more than all the good words I have now in my mind.
You are a real crow!
:)
And I think all friends had some part of their shiny souls in their line ...all of them are so profound and beautiful that I'd love to read them aloud again and again and to ponder on them..

Yes Yes yes ...
I'm ready for the next one!
:D
Love to all.

Debra Kay said...

That was really powerful, and good and a lot of fun. And while the result isn't the entire point, the result is beautiful as well.

Forever Young said...

howdy, thanks for your visit and nice comments.feel i've made a new friend in blogland. would've loved to join you in this poem chain, wonderful.
why don't you designate a day a week for a 'chain day' and we can all contribute? could be fun!

Forever Young said...

ha ha, btw miss doodle had nothing to do with my profile pic. it was drawn by a 6 year old in my class last year'my teacher and her dog'. great, isn't it?

Hopper said...

thanks HB for your note... i think i'll take the advice of forever young and try and do one of these exercises a week... it's a good way to keep the old brain moving...

and forever young... please don't tell miss doodle i said that... her work is definitely not that of a six year old (LOL)... actually i was jealous and was going to ask her if she'd make me a pic!!! and yes... i like the idea of a chain poem each week... was thinking that from the response to this first one it would be a fun endeavor...

so debra... what do you say... you be up for another one next week???

Cestandrea said...

:)
Oh what a beautiful poem, and I am impressed and feel so warmly connected by the words, the metaphores we created,through time and space:)
I agree with HB, here one tends to be self-centered but we got together, thanks to you, Hopper, to create. Would be happy to do this again. Thanks Hopper, for inviting me,
love
Andrea

Cestandrea said...

PS: thanks for pasting Miss Doodle in you blogroll, I will do the same, dear friend,
Andrea

human being said...

Oh Andrea, dear friends...

when i said "here" i meant my country.... not blogland... intellectuals in my country Iran are mostly self-centered...
Sorry if my limping words have offended anyone...
Love to you all.

A. Stageman said...

Hooray for mutual friends! Haha.
I like your site, as well.

A chain poem...what a wonderful idea. I have never participated in one but I would love to give it a go.

Btw, love this line: "We go where time goes when it's gone". Lovely.

Lynn said...

This is a beautiful poem you all created together as a unified group. I did not understand at first how it was created. I thought it was another of Hoppers poems that just SPOKE TO ME in such beautiful ways. Funny,though when I read the line about listening to the Crow I thought of Human Being immediately. But I also thought of myself when I read about walking briskly. ;-)
I have to figure out how you did this as I'd love to participate.

Hopper thank you again (I did on my blog too) for your response to mine and for agreeing to repost B-B poem on Remembrance Day, May 1.
Thank you for the link as well.

Honour said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Honour said...

I had no doubt that with such creative souls that I would be pleased ... but this is really far beyond even my wildest imaginings. Lovely, lovely work ... thanks for letting me be a part of it all. Hopper, brilliant to see you foster such love of word ... only good can result. did you like the slant rhyme? that actually was on purpose. learned that one from a friend ... look forward to the next synergestic meeting of the souls

BBC said...

Actually, I didn't catch on that it was a chain poem until later, sorry about that.

Being as you like poetry.
A lovely poem

sukipoet said...

This is very fun and although I wasn't invited to participate I should love to do so in future. Although I don't know what a"plosive" is.

HB I too thought you meant in the universal blogland you found no interlink cooperation at making things together and I did wonder as it seems to me even blogging back and forth and not necc writing a poem there is such a sense of connection and interlinking and working together. At least to me.

sukipoet said...

ps than ks for visiting my blog

Debra Kay said...

If I must wait an entire week, I shall!

The Other Ivy said...

Hello,
Human Being sent me over here time got away from me) Great idea!

We walk a seven day mile...
even our cells listen
to the leafy green emerge.